The racehorse owner was annoyed with the running of his horse at the race.
He turned on the jockey. “Hey, could you not have raced faster?”
“Sure I could have, but you know we are supposed to stay on the horse.”
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A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, “I’ve got to take you in, pal. You’re obviously drunk.
” The man: “Officer, are you absolutely sure I’m drunk?”
The cop: “Yeah, I’m sure.”
“Let’s go.” Breathing a sigh of relief, the man said, “Thank goodness, I thought I was crippled.”
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Little Bobbie, while at a neighbour’s, was given a piece of bread and butter, and politely said, “Thank you.”
“That’s right, Bobbie,” said the lady. “I like to hear little boys say ‘thank you’.”
“Well,” rejoined Bobbie. “If you want to hear me say it again you might put some jam on it.”
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Teacher: “Daniel, you must not use ‘a’ before a plural noun. Say ‘cow’ not ‘a cows’.” Daniel: “But Teacher, my preacher always says ‘amen’.”
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